


Skydiving For Idiots

by snivellus (queervulcan)



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Post-War, M/M, Skydiving, frightened snape, tomfoolery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-19
Updated: 2015-04-19
Packaged: 2018-03-24 16:33:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,041
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3775666
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/queervulcan/pseuds/snivellus
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Based on tumblr prompt by otpprompts tumblr: Imagine your OTP skydiving together. Person A pretends their parachute isn’t working and person B nearly has a heart attack<br/>---<br/>In which Harry gets his revenge.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Skydiving For Idiots

_Fun_ , the brat had said. It would be relaxing.

Severus was too old for this shit. Going on forty five, with a man more than two decades younger than him and still getting dragged around like a dog in submission. If tortured into answer, he would say he enjoyed relenting his strict control over onto someone he could trust. If pressed with sex, he would admit that he even found pleasure in giving over control when not in coitus.

At the moment, he was unwilling to do either, to do anything but strangle the man he called his husband. And if that was not possible, then to give the brat what he deserved.

* * *

 

Harry was bored. Harry was annoyed. When Harry had suggested couple sky diving, Severus had shrugged and waved it off, saying he could do whatever he so wanted, as long as neither of them got hurt.

Harry was hurt and angry at Severus currently, for not even letting him hold his hand in public. In front of Muggles, no less.

"Severus, please?" Harry whispered into his back, resting his forehead on the man's shoulder blade and counting the heartbeats he could feel hammering away.

Severus huffed and pulled away, dislodging Harry so quickly he barely had time to catch his balance before he landed face first on the cement. Severus didn't so much as turn around.

_Oh, it's on now._

* * *

Severus had to fight the urge to twist his wedding band, what he did when his nerves were shot and he had too much on his mind. He knew Harry was feeling all sorts of things right now, hurt and frustration in the top. He also knew that Harry tended to act stupid when he got to this point.

Severus sighed, and glanced over at his pouting lover. Would it really hurt if he pulled him close and gave him a quick peck? Severus glanced around and decided that no, it probably wouldn't kill him to wipe that pout off Harry.

As if sensing the scrutiny, Harry turned his face up to meet Severus', and the corners of his eyes crinkled. Severus sighed, and wrapped an arm around his lover's waist. The delight that bloomed across Harry's features was palpable, almost as bright as the sun, and Severus felt his discomfort lessen knowing he could make Harry feel so happy, make him look so alive, with just a simple touch.

* * *

 

Harry was getting motion sickness from being on the helicopter too long, too high. He cut a glance at his partner and found he wasn't faring much better, his sallow skin just a shade too pale, with a queasy expression that probably matched Harry's.

"We can ride brooms, but we can't ride this?" Harry mumbled under his breath, knowing Severus would hear regardless.

He was proven right when Severus made a noiseless snort, and his fingers tapped against his thigh, when he was either amused or thinking.

Severus shifted so his foot was touching Harry's booted foot, "Will you jump first or will I?" he murmured near his lovers ear.

Harry shivered in pleasure, "How about at the same time?"

Severus thought about it for a minute, and seemed to agree, for he gave a curt nod.

* * *

 

Harry peeked over the edge and hastily backed up.

“What was I _thinking_ suggesting this?”

“You weren’t.”

* * *

Severus gripped Harry’s hand so hard their knuckles turned white and the blood rushed to their fingers.

“You owe me, Potter.”

“If we survive!”

Behind them, the employee snickered and finished double checking for faulty parachutes.

“All done, sirs.”

Severus and Harry looked at each other, both wide eyed and pale.

“Ready?”

“Absolutely not.”

With that, Harry tugged on Severus’ hand, pulling them down, down, down. The wind whooshed past Harry’s ears, his cheeks felt wind burned.

When Harry had suggested skydiving, he knew there were places that offered couple skydiving, and that had been what he had chosen for this trip. He also knew that, if he wanted to get revenge on Severus for not letting him hold his hand, then now would be the perfect moment.

And so, when their cheeks were air burned and their hair past the point of having no knots without also losing some hair, Harry decided to play a prank worthy of the Marauders.

It would all backfire, as it always did.

* * *

 

Severus knew they were approaching the area where they had to let their parachute go, and thought his lover should know.

“Harry, pull the parachute soon!”

Except he didn’t.

They kept falling, too fast, and Severus tried craning his head back to see the problem.

Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted Harry’s panicked expression. Severus heart rate increased, and he snapped his head back around, refusing to believe they were about to plummet.

* * *

 

Harry was glad for the Dursley’s giving him practice in concealing his emotions, and again in mastering Occlumency. Without it, he wouldn’t have been able to continue the prank of letting Severus think the parachute was broken, not after seeing his already pale face turn pasty.

As it was, Harry would let them drop for a few more seconds, and then would pull the safety device.

* * *

 

The last time Severus had been this terrified had been at the Final Battle, and then he had barely batted an eyelash. But falling a hundred feet was different from fighting a crazy dark lord.

Just when Severus thought they were going to become the new scenery, he felt the parachute lift them, grunting as the air was pushed from his lungs.

* * *

When they reached the ground again, Severus felt as if his legs were made from jelly. His knees felt weak, and he just knew his body was shaking. He wouldn’t have been surprised if Harry sported bruises on his hand tomorrow from how hard he was gripping it.

As it was, Harry just snickered at his current reaction.

Severus hadn’t survived two wars of spying for nothing. He just knew Harry had done that on purpose. He could see the satisfaction and laughter in his eyes.

“You will pay, you utter ignoramus.”

Severus relished the slight look of fear and shock that crossed Harry’s face for the rest of the day.


End file.
